Dhananjay Parkhe ★ºधनंजय✦पारखेº™🇮🇳

★Pro-Bono Advisorº ★C-Suite Mentorº ★Artist ★CSRº ★Excellence Assessorº

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Satire: My Kick-stutter Idea: "Dieters – Calibrate Weighing Scales"

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Dhananjay Parkhe

Dhananjay Parkhe

Self Actualising. Life isn’t about finding yourself, it’s about creating yourself.

Satire: My Kick-stutter Idea: “Dieters – Calibrate Weighing Scales”

Key Idea – Start a Calibration of Home Weighing Scales as a Public Service with Franchisees all around the world situated strategically next door to the Dietitians and Diabetic Centres. Depending upon the Franchisee motivation they can choose to give this service ProBono ( if they are badly impacted) or Paid ( In any case, I would like to be paid for the Idea and the necessary calibration kit/s, and technical know-how.
My short Graphical Thesis for the Crowd who can think about Investing in the Idea is given below made with the Thesis Statement Generator for the Movie as this ideas as the potential of becoming a great Movie some day:)
So coming to the Main Idea and thoughts surrounding it and how this Idea came to me are described below. I am sorry, I don’t have the time to make it short as most of it is ‘Cut and Paste’ work with due credit given to the worthy writers.
A socalled Wellwisher sent me this article. And I thank him/ her ( to keep their anonymity and privacy) for two reasons. One, for not sharing with my Dearest Loving Wife. My wife is not an Innovator by her buying Behaviour but and Early Adopter. She adapts all ideas and tries them on her favorite Guinea Pi… you guessed it right – Me ! Especially when they concern about any Supplement, food supplement ( Like Green Grass + Dudhi i.e. White Gourd Juice with black pepper early in the morning for choked arteries to prevent me from Heart failure ! ) WOW ! and it works. Trust Me as I am alive ain’t it ? But I’m not even a Late Adopter by my buying habits or eating habits – I am what the marketers typically call = Laggard, a skeptic, critic and generally tough Nut to crack :). Secondly, I thank the wellwisher for giving me the idea for writing this article. That’s call ‘Provoking Thought’ or Thought Provoking. So thank you dear sender.
There is this one thing about ‘Me’ – I see Trends and I love to watch them.
1. Crowdfunding is gaining currency.
2. More and more people are getting attracted about KickStarter Ideas and get funds from Public without going ‘Public’ with a Public Issue of Shares. ( What an Idea Sirjee – Masking and ;bypassing the compliance and legal issues !
3. More and more Dietitians are growing, Newer Fads are coming into Diet ‘Industry’ as More and More young people are finding themselves Obese or Diabetic.
4. eCommerce/ eTail is growing at a mad, mad pace being funded by Wall Street funding for advertising and people in India are getting Ready to…. EXIT with loads of Cash A.S.A.P. i.e. Get Rich Quick with an eComm/eTail idea.
But, I am focusing on the Point 3 here Mainly. Mainly, because, there will be a dash of points from 1,2 and 4 sprinkled in between in this article, so please read on.
Now, those of you who know me ( I am on Linkedin since June 2004, and have about 4900 connections and 5900 followers on Linkedin Pulse and I am writing my 180th post, blah, blah, blah… 🙂 ) know that I am a Diabetic, Cardiac, Obese diseased person who is now on a strict Diet for survival with a great exercise and Diet regimen and excellent Medical Advisors. I love to draw and paint as hobby and Surf, Network and Write these posts as ‘Self – Pleasure’ whenever I feel like indulging into ‘Luxury of Mind’. But, that’s enough about myself. There is a great resource for those who have questions to ask a Dietitian.
Being in the Express business I had the first experience with the ISO 9001 auditor who asked for the Calibration certificate of all the weighing Scales in the company. It was such a dreadful moment. We all feared for the NC – Non-Compliance remarks. Today, when I am on Diet I remember each machine showing different weights, including mine. One day, I was weighed in a Hospital on three different machines and the weights were 91, 93 and 95.5 Kilos. My home machine had 89.6 and I keep a record on this machine daily. My doctor was kind. He said, next visit he would consider my notings of the weight, BP, Sugar rather than the Hospital weighing scales.
Now if we are not careful, we shall be very very scared by the Dietitian’s talk of further reduction of ‘whatever you like’ foods and further addition of the blandest food. This gave me a thought – why not play ‘One Up’ and begin a business of calibration of the weighing scales.
Here is my Pitch with some borrowed Cartoon slides from the Internet in support of my Kickstarter Crowdfunding and I hope you like it.
“The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you’re off it.”
— Jackie Gleason
“A diet is when you watch what you eat and wish you could eat what you watch.”
— Hermione Gingold
“The first thing you lose on a diet is brain mass.”
— Margaret Cho
“An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.”
— Irv Kupcinet
“My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people.”
— Orson Welles
“I’m not overweight. I’m just nine inches too short.”
— Shelley Winters
“It’s okay to be fat. So you’re fat. Just be fat and shut up about it.”
— Roseanne Barr
“Many a person who goes on a diet finds out in short order that they are poor losers.”
— Unknown
“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst, for they are sticking to their diets.”
— Unknown
“Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow ye diet.”
— William Gilmore Beymer
“I keep trying to lose weight… but it keeps finding me!”
— Unknown
“Rich, fatty foods are like destiny: they too, shape our ends.”
— Unknown
“A diet is the penalty we pay for exceeding the feed limit.”
— Unknown
“The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.”
— Unknown
“Probably nothing in the world arouses more false hopes than the first four hours of a diet.”
— Dan Bennett
“In the Middle Ages, they had guillotines, stretch racks, whips, and chains. Nowadays, we have a much more effective torture device called the bathroom scale.”
— Stephen Phillips
“The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books—how not to eat what you’ve just learned how to cook.”
— Andy Rooney
“My soul is dark
With stormy riot:
Directly traced
Over to diet.”
— Samuel Hoffenstein
Do let me know what you think of this idea.

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